“What the hell is that?!” - we detected our business Partner, Neil, whose responsibility was getting what we purchased back on the road wasn’t happy. If we weren’t 100% sure about that, he removed all doubt as he turned away and walked back across the yard where our recovery truck was dropping off the Splitty to his office. Hmmm, we both thought. What to do now? Keep quiet, unload the truck and he’ll calm down.

Five and half hours after leaving East London, we are bumping down a single lane farm track with low dense hedges either side, towards a closed five bar gate wondering where Sally SatNav had led us this time. We are about two miles from Newquay in Cornwall, but we might as well be in the middle of nowhere. We decide to stop and call our contact...